all prayers accepted...

Just got another call from the farm. Grandpa is having a horrible time with the pain - either the pain itself or the fentynal patch he is on is causing hallucinations - he was trying to get the cheese off his body 15 minutes ago. Even at a distance, my family calls me for advise and direction. The weather is bad for driving, and its new years eve, but I may well be on my way out the door again to take him back to the hospital. This time they WILL NOT send him home to the farm in the care of my 88 year old Grandma. We need help and no one else seems to have a loud enough voice as an advocate! My kids are going to have to understand that Mommy will be gone again tonight - we'll have to celebrate a delayed new years...

Any one reads this and is inclined to pray, please add him to your prayer list!

2 LONG days...

What a couple of days it has been!

My 92 year old grandfather has been suffering from post herpetic neuralgia since Dec 24th. He was diagnosed with shingles about 7 weeks ago, and although the lesions have healed, he is left with /severe nerve pain in his eye, face, top and back of head. This is an unbearablee pain. This man, usually stoic in the face of any illness/injury (he has had both knees replaced) has been screaming with pain every two hours for days! My mother and aunt have been doing the besst they could to handle it. Christmas Eve they spent 7 hours in teh local hopital emergency waiing room, only to be sent to the doctor who performed his cateract surgery in March. The eye doctor dismissed him and addressed a letter to the emergency room advising he see a neurologist for pain management treatment. Instead, my mom toook him to a walk in clinic. The doctor there had incomplete information provided and perscribed oxycodone ( an opiate based medicine). No one seemed to remember the problems he had on morphine (severe hallucinations). The combination of the oxycodone and the pain he continued to endure has caused him to hallucinate and lose all track of what is going on. I have been trying to provide support long distance over the phone, and yesterdday, they asked that I come up to take care of him myself. My grandmother is not coping well with seeing her husband of 67 years suffer through all this. She has anxiety and needs as much support and comfort as he does!

After watching the man suffer for 4 hours with barely 20 minutes relatively pain free, I suggestedd to him that I thought he needed to go back to emergency and have someone assess the pain he was experiencing and possible suggest an alternative medication. He agreed to go by ambulance. The EMT personel was wonderful and treated both my grandparents with kindness and compassion for their situation. I went in the ambulance with my grandfather and my aunt drove my grandmother to the hospital.

Emergency was packed! In the corridor for patients brought in on stretchers, there were 6 patients in line. The wait was expected to be 6 or 7 hours. Grandpa was not very happy with having to wait, and wanted to go home on more than one occasion. I refused to allow it. We saw teh doctor at 2am. 9 hours after going in. For him, the only comfort was that he was able to lie down on a stretcher or bed for the duration of the wait. My grandmother was given food, juice, a warm blanket and a chair to sit on. When teh doctor arrived, he was wonderful. My grandfather was lucid enough to tell teh doctor he should speak with me as he was somewhat confused. We ended up with a pain patch, and very clear directions about how to manage for the next few days. He also gave us his office number as he would be available January 4th - 5 days before the family doctor was due to return from vacation. At least we ended up with a consistent contact to follow up with! We took a cab home and arrived at 3am. Grandpa had a horrible night. He had 3 HUGE bouts of pain that nearly incapacitated him. He screamed and asked what do I do. All I could do was try to focus him on his breathing and use yoga breathing to try and ride out the pain. He kept claiming he couldn't breathe, but managed to get through them - although all three of us were exhausted from it. I was worried that he kept rolling onto the side of his face that was sensitive while he slept, so I rolled up towels and lay them behind his back to keep him on one side while he slept. It seemed to work. I think I managed to get 2 hours of sleep.

Meanwhile, my kids had an anxious night as well. I have never been away overnight in their lives and apparently they had a hard time sleeping. So this afternoon when I came home, I promised to take them to the outdoor rink skating tonight. Fool that I am - thought that would be a reasonable plan! We brought one of 6's friends with us. Well guess what. The friend is not a very good skater. He spent about an hour on the ice - walking up and doen the lenngth of the rink. Then he decided to get off the ice for a break. On his return, he stubbornly refused assistance getting back on the ice and fell. Feet went up in the air, landed on his backside and one arm flung out onto the ice. I could tell from his reaction it was not a minor injury. Went inside to check him out and he could not move the fingers of his right hand. Called his dad, who took him to the hospital. Cam home with his arm in a cast. The kid broke his arm!

I feel horrible! Anyone want me to take care of their kids for a while?

10am and they're still asleep!

So I thought I would takke the time to write a bit more...

They're onlly sleeping because I had them really riled up last night. Monkey in the middle (played with juggling balls) in the middle of the kitchen is not exactly the quiet pre-bedtime routine all the parenting books suggest, but we're on holidays!

The house is a disaster. I should be cleaning, but haven't yet reached the point of disgust necessary to motivate me to clean.

Work update - since my new boss was put into place, things have become much better. There are clear expectations - things I seem to be able to manage, and not being told you're incompetent on a daily basis does wonders for your self-esteem! Last week, just before we all left for vacation, the new boss called me into a closed door meeting. Sheesh! that makes me panic! Then he pulled out a brown envelope...more panic. No need. The envelope contaned a letter detailing my raise. (~15% increase after 6 months on the job!!). The only problem with more money, is that it makes me feel somehow like I need to work harder to be worthy of it. Don't know how I can possibly put in more effort than I do already, but the pressure to do so is there. My area of responsiblility has doubled in the past month. Looks like I will be needing some more staff!

Well, I should take this time to read my newspaper without interruption. Cleaning is on the day's agenda as well - we'll see how it goes...

Christmas

Well, it's finally over! Chaotic, crazy, illness-plagued holiday that it is! Both girls are sick. They came down with an awful barking, coughing, congested viral thing the week before Christmas. This is usual for us. Too much excitement, too little sleep and both are ill for the big day. Not that it stops them, mind you...

Our second annual craft party was a hit with all! Friends of 6 all begged for playdates at our house, and the father of one of the girls went home and told his wife that our house if full of love! (such a nice thing to hear!)

Teacher gifts were finished - 6 downloaded a playlist of her favourite songs for her teacher (who is also the choir director at school). It was an interesting compilation of Broadway (Into the Woods, Wicked and the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee), Jazz (Manhattan Transfer), Christmas songs (Clay Aiken, Bing Crosby and Elvis) and Hedley (her favourite rock band).
4 picked out a cyclamen for her teacher - plants are always good. She was also hard at work creating crafts for one and all!

Christmas Eve, I got a call letting me know that my 92 year old grandfather was in Emergency. He has been experiencing tremendous pain in his head (which I guessed was related to shingles he has in his eye), but he was convinced that it was an aneurism. After 9 hours in emerg, he was sent home with no pain killers - just dir4ection to take tylenol if he was in pain! Needless to say, Christmas day was awful for him! He was in agony the whole time.

We had a family gathering at my mother's - 18 people in all - 7 kids in all. My mother loves to host these gatherings, but she is totally incapable of cooking a meal for them. Her home is beautifully decorated - table setting worthy of Martha Stewart's compliments, but cook a turkey? Can't do it. She called me five times Christmas morning for directions. She would usually call my grandmother, but was reluctant to disturb them after the events of the previous day. So I was dial-a chef! I knew this also meant that I would be welcomed into her kitchen to complete the meal preparations upon our arrival at her home. Sure enough...

Complaint - no one thinks to watch my kids when I am cooking. Check to see which gifts are from who. Take note - ensure they are gratiously received. We left with a bag of gifts from "I don't know who".

Does anyone else have a problem with the amount of packaging toys come in? My entire front stairway is filled with boxes, plastic, little wire thingies - all waiting to be separated into appropriate recycling piles. It's insane!

We have spent a restful few days - peerig longingly out at the rink that is no longer frozen, watching the snow melt. We've seen about 7 movies in all. 6was surprised and thrilled to discover that her favourite actress (Bernadette Peters) played a part in 4's new move of Annie.

Tomorrow is going to be a cleaning day. We all need to get moving again. No special plans for New Years.

Hope you all had a good holiday!

It's been awhile...

since I've had a moment to post anything at all. I have kept up with reading a couple of blogs, but haven't had time to comment on them or to write anything here. Many thoughts - no time.

The kids are fine. We had a couple of lousy parent/teacher interviews. 4, it turns out is the worst behaved child inher class. She is bright, but cannot sit still or remain attentive at group time. Took her to the doctor to have a hearing test, and to talk about her allergies. Mentioned that she is having much difficulty at school. Acedemically? he asked. "No problem there". "it's probably boredom" was his response. Still, she is on a course of claritin (daytime) and benadryl (nightly) to see if her perpetual stuffiness is cleared. It seems to be working. The day after the teacher and I sat with her to discuss what was required of her in class, she decided to kiss one of the boys at group time. Repeatedly. More trouble. I told her it was time she got to be known for her intelligence and her personality, and until then, she would attend school in sweats and a t-shirt. No cute outfits. And if the behaviour continued, I would pull her out of school. Since schooling is not mandatory until age 6, I have some leverage with this threat. She loves school and doesn not want to miss it. She is already at a Grade one level, so no loss there. She has had one week of perfect behaviour.

My interview with 6's teacher lasted 5 minutes. Since 4's teacher was running late, I lost time with the 2nd grade teacher. Again, she is academically great. I was warned that she has severe social problems. Apparently I have a huge challenge on my hands. The example cited was ridiculous! At lunchtime, she opened her mouth with food in it - as a joke. This is not acceptable behaviour from children. It indicates severe social deficiets. (I wonder how they would feel about my 42 year old friend who still thinks this is funny?!) Basically, I left with a bit of grief in my heart, and the distinct impression that my square peg just doesn't fit. "She hasn't found her niche", said her teacher. How could she? I asked. This is a classroom full of girly girls. She is not likely to find her niche here!

So my dysfunctional children and I continue on. Christmas is coming. We have baked cookies, held a craft party for 8 of their friends, made gifts, shopped and are close to being ready for the big day. I am loooking so forward to the time between Christmas and January 9th when I can have some holiday time with them, The skating rink is progressing well and it looks like it will be ready for Christmas eve skating. We have a couple of plays we want to see and the thought of 15 days off mean we will have some leisure time as well.

In case I don't have another opportunity to post anytime soon, I wish you all a happy holiday season!

the report is in

Both girls got their report cards on Monday. 6 was worried. "I think I got all C's", she said. Wrong! My faith in her teacher has been restored. from B to A+. Don't much care if my shy child gets a B in Drama. B in writing - with a comment that speed of settling on a topic seems to be the impediment. Her writing is clear, thoughtful, well planned, articulate , neat and organized - when she finally gets around to it... A's in math and reading. Her social deficiencies weree noted, but so were her strengths. A great report - and one happy kid!

On the other hand, 4 got the most atrocious report card I have ever seen for a Kindergarten student. Completely appalling behaviour. Doen't listen, doesn't follow class rules, soesn't treat friends with respect. Why did it take until December to bring this to light? Apparently, the teacher just noticed how bad it has gotten!

Meetings tomorrow. 4 will attend with me. 2 adults against one maipulative child. Hope we can make an impression!

what's not baloney

More news from 4's teacher. She has not been paying attention at group time. On one occasion, she ran and hid in her cubby in the middle of the national anthem. This is going on her report card. No one at school asked why she hid.

I asked.

4 has been having shoe toubles. She can tie her own laces, and insisted that she take her lace up shoes to school. One problem - they don't stay done up. She fiddles. As for hiding, 4 has a dreadful fear of fire alarms. Started in JK - won't settle down. If a buzzer, alarm clock or phone pager goes off in our house, she runs and either hides or clings to my leg.

Apparently, on the day of the 'incident', in the middle of the national anthem, 4 looked down and realized she had forgotten to put on her shoes. "What if there was a fire alarm?" she sobbed. "I wouldn't have shoes and I would have to find them, tie them up and be late getting outside!"

This was not a manipulatative answer. 4 is known for her cheerful, upbeat nature. Nothing bother her - except the thought of a fire alarm!

We bought slip on shoes that night. I will meet with the teacher to discuss. And I think a trip to the fire station is in order...